Five Weeks Old.

Miss Molly,

Well, five weeks ago right now I was getting a shower and breathing through contractions, wondering when you'd be making your arrival. Who would you look like? What color hair would you have? How exactly would your birth story play out? Now we know all those answers! One on side it feels like you were always a part of us, Daddy agrees. I know it sounds corny, but we were destined to be your parents. I already can't remember what life was like without you. But, on the other hand time has absolutely flown by. I was looking at newborn pictures this week while you were napping in my arms and I was tearing up looking at how small you were and just how big you are now! You've passed your one month mark, although I'm not sure when since you were born on the 31st and June didn't have a 31st day, so I guess that pushed it to July 1, but then will you turn 1 month and 2 months in the same month? That's confusing...

You're getting more fun now, and more awake during the day. You're a cat napper - if we're out, you usually only sleep for 20 minutes or so and then you're up. You must be a little busy body and nosy! If we're home though, there's days where I feel like you're sleeping all day long! We haven't figured out a schedule quite yet, but sleeping at night is going fabulously! Last night you actually slept from 10:30 until 4:45! I couldn't believe it! I'm going to ask the pediatrician at our appointment on Monday if that's okay for you to go that long without eating, but my instincts are telling me its alright. Usually you're in bed by 10 or so after a few feedings, and sleep until around 2:30 or 3, eat and back to bed until 5 or so, eat again and I bring you in bed with me after Daddy leaves and we sleep until at least 8, sometimes 9 or 10! Monday and Tuesday nights, after your 3am feeding, I put you in the crib before you totally fell asleep and you put yourself to sleep! Granted, it took about 20 minutes, but I never had to pick you up! You didn't cry at all, just moved around a little bit and eventually fell asleep! I was so proud!

I love when you're awake and alert during the day! I know you can hear us, and you usually can follow us with your eyes, too. You're kind of starting to smile and laugh, but I don't know if they're real smiles yet. I think so because before you'd smile when you were sleeping or in the process of falling asleep/waking up, but now it's more when you're awake. You're so happy in the morning, I love just cuddling with you and watching you move around and take in your surroundings. For the most part, you are a happy baby, only really crying when you're hungry and I don't feed you right away.

We had your first holiday yesterday - the 4th of July! It was pretty low key, we were over Grandma and Poppa's house all day long, after breakfast with Grammy and Pappy. You were pretty good for breakfast, that's the second time you went out to eat with us this week - the first was on Sunday with Uncle Billy. You were hungry both times, and from now on I'll remember to pump a bottle before we go so that we have it on hand for you to eat while we're waiting for our food. I gave you two bottles yesterday! With so many people at Grandma and Poppa's house and no chair in the corner to feed you, it was easier to just pump and give you a bottle, so that's what we did. I want to give you a few bottles a week anyways so that you can switch easily between bottles and nursing.

You and I took our first grocery shopping trip out alone! We ventured to Wegmans and Babies R Us. I took the Ergo and wore you at both stores and you were good! About halfway through Wegmans you started to get fussy and so I hurried up because I didn't know if you were going to cry, but once I gave you your pacifier, you were out and I poked around a little more. Between the Moby wrap and the Ergo carrier, I'm all set with baby wearing. I absolutely love being able to have you close to me and have my hands free. It's so handy! I think you like it, too, although I think you'd prefer to look around. I even get Daddy to wear you when we're out!

We've stopped block feeding, and your poops are normal again, so we're back on the normal eating on one side until it's empty, offering the other side, and switching sides for the next feeding business again. With some pumping/giving bottles thrown in there. I'm still pumping at night after the 3am feeding. I'm debating on getting an electric pump since I've been using a manual that we got free from the hospital. It's hard to justify spending that kind of money on something that I know I can't return if I don't like it. I don't mind the manual one, but I'm usually pumping for at least 25 minutes on each side, even after you eat, and that takes a looooong time at 3am when I could be sleeping. Daddy said he doesn't mind spending the money because it's something that I will most definitely need and makes my life easier. With all the amazon orders I've been getting, you'd think I wouldn't have a problem spending more money, but when it's something expensive that I can't return, I get nervous.

I'm anxious to see how much you weigh at your appointment on Monday. It makes me feel good that you're growing on breast milk alone, that my body can nourish you and give you everything you need. I remember that each time I look (with pride) at my stretch mark filled, fluffy mom pouch. I love it though, I really do. I'm so proud of what my body did! You're definitely growing though, you're officially out of newborn diapers, sadly, and your newborn pjs are fitting perfectly. I just keep remembering that your feet barely reached the footie part when we brought you home from the hospital. You're even filling out your swaddle now! It's hard to appreciate every day when I'm wondering what you'll be like in a month, or a year, or 5 years. What will you be when you grow up? But I'm trying really hard to live in the moment and soak up each moment.

I love you baby girl, and I love being your mommy!