Four Weeks Old.

Miss Molly,

You are such a good baby! Granted, you like to be held and still don't really like your crib all that much, but I know it's not going to be forever that you want to be snuggled in Momma's arms, so I'll appreciate it now. I haven't even bothered putting you in your crib for nap time. I'll just hold you, or Grammy will hold you. I don't mind, really. It would be nice to get some things done, but I appreciate all the snuggles. I know some people say I'm spoiling you by holding you during nap times, but you're still good in your crib most night's. As long as that doesn't get screwed up then I'll be okay. We're getting some good 5 hour stretches in now, and I so appreciate it! We're still sleeping in until anywhere from 8-10:30 in the morning, and most of the nights you've slept in your crib. We usually sleep about 4-5 hours, wake up to eat, then back to sleep in the crib for another 2-3 hours, which is usually around the time Daddy goes to work. Once he goes to work, I bring you in bed with me in the Boppy and we go back to sleep after I feed you again. I think two nights last week we were in the recliner, but it's usually when Mommy gets tired and you want to be awake! I'm just too tired to try to get you to sleep, it's easier to fall asleep on the recliner with you in my arms.

We gave you your first bath in the tub this week! Aunt Jeanne gave us this thing that they used for Gwennie to keep your head out of the water, so that works really well for us. Daddy still gives you your baths, I'd like it if that was his thing to do, since he's gone all day long working, I think bath and bedtime should be his bonding time with you. He loves you so much, and I hope you know that, even if he's not around all the time because he's working.

I started pumping this week. Since I started block feeding - I know that my over supply is self diagnosed, and I should call the Lactation Consultant, just haven't yet - I didn't want to hurt my supply, so if you go for 2-3 hours between feedings, usually at night, then I'll pump whichever side I don't use. Now that I typed that out, though, it seems kind of counter-productive. Hmm. Maybe I'll put that call higher on my to do list...
But anyways, really I've been doing block feeding because your poops are kind of foamy. I'm sure you'll love to hear about that when you're 16, but I want to remember. I was googling what the foamy poops were and it seems to come from an imbalance of fore milk and hind milk. Since you aren't eating for more than 10ish minutes or so on one side, then it makes sense you aren't getting the hind milk that you need. Then you're hungry in an hour, so I've been doing 2 hour blocks of nursing on the same side. Sometimes I think it works and other time I don't think it works. I don't know, I really should call the LC.

Let's see, we went to your Auntie Dawn's birthday party last week and you totally stole the show. Christopher even said that you were the cutest baby he's ever seen before! Everyone kept giving you kisses and complimenting you, saying how adorable you were. You barely fussed, only when you were hungry and once I fed you, you were just fine again. It's weird, everyone knows that babies cry, but when I take you out, I want you to be the perfect baby, it doesn't make sense. I get embarrassed if you fuss or cry, and it makes me feel like other people think I'm not a good mom because I can't keep my baby from crying. Guess it's a strange parent thing. Well, maybe a mom thing.
We also went to Walmart last weekend, and I wore you in the Ergo, and loved it! You loved it, too, slept the whole time. I got a couple funny looks, and a couple compliments from people. It's so comfortable to wear, and I have free hands! It's hard to eat while I'm wearing you, but that's okay, I wouldn't wear it to a restaurant. Daddy even wore you on Sunday when we went to Kohl's for some new clothes for Mommy. He said he felt weird, but he knows how much easier it is than carrying the car seat or pushing the stroller.

You can follow our voices and faces now! The other night while Daddy was talking and then walked out of your line of vision you followed him until you couldn't anymore and then just waited until he walked back. Grammy was doing the same thing, just walking back and forth and you followed her. You're starting to make sounds, too, just some baby noises. It's adorable!

We've gone for a couple walks this week, and even took a walk with Haley and Enoch (the youth minister at my church's wife and son). Enoch is only 3 months older than you, so hopefully you two can be good friends! It's strange to see how big he is compared to you, and I don't like to think you'll be that big, but I know it's coming. I just looked at the pictures I've taken of you (about 300 in one month!) and can't believe how much you've already grown!

We have about a week and a half until your next pediatrician's appointment and I'm anxious to see how much you weigh, and how long you are! You also have to get two shots, which I'm not thrilled about, but I know you have to get them. I have a few questions to ask the pediatrician, your eyes are really goopy, constantly I have to wipe them, and I didn't know what that was from. Also, about the foamy poop, and you make this gasping/wheezing noise a lot. It's like you can't catch your breath. It makes me nervous. You always do catch your breath and it doesn't seem to bother you, but I'd like to know what it's caused by and if it's anything to worry about.

I just can't believe how big you're getting! Daddy and I were just talking about how it seems like you've been here forever. I told him I think you were always with us in our minds and hearts, as corny as that sounds, and it just makes sense for you to be here with us baby girl! We love you so much!

Love,
Mommy

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P.S. My mom dug this picture of me out, I'm on the left at 2 months old, and Molly is on the right at 4 weeks. It's so weird how similar we look, don't you think???

Plans for Post-Baby Body.

Like I said last week, I feel back to 100% now, but I won't push myself. I think all the weight I'm going to loose from delivering is finished - about 25 ish pounds. I still have about 25 to go until I'm back at my pre-pregnancy weight, and then I have about another 15 to go until I reach my goal weight. Granted, I'm a mom now, and I'll see how I feel when I get down to my pre-pregnancy weight. I want to be strong and healthy, and a good role model for my daughter. I haven't been watching what I've been eating, I'm giving myself the month of June to kind of just figure things out, and July 1, I'll be back on My Fitness Pal, I believe. After my 6 week checkup on July 12, I'm hoping to pick up running again, and in the meantime I need to go for walking, probably daily, there's no reason not to. I just have to watch the summer heat. 

This weekend, I'm dragging Mr. Skinny out to go shopping for some clothes for me since I'm wider than I was pre-pregnancy. I tried on shorts that fit when I weighed more than I do now before I joined WW and I could barely get them up, so yep, definitely wider. That's fine, I'll take an excuse to go on a shopping trip and transform my wardrobe into a "mommy-friendly" wardrobe. Not a problem. I ordered a bunch of nursing tops and a bunch of skirts, I think I'm done with shorts, they don't flatter me and since I'm a mom, I don't have to fit in with the "normal" 23 year olds out there with super short shorts. 

Another goal for this weekend - a bathing suit. Sure, this might warrant some tears at Kohls, but I need to get a few tops that fit me and make me feel good. I do know that I have a daughter now and I have to be a good role model for her, even if she doesn't know exactly what I'm talking about, I don't want to teach her to have a negative body image. So I'll be working on that. I'm so thankful that my body birthed a baby without any medical intervention (and I'm not putting down any other births, but I got the birth I wanted, and I'm darn proud of that. Every mom should be proud of her birth)  that I think I have a whole new appreciation for it. I'm sure I'll still get annoyed with it at some point, but hopefully I won't verbalize that in front of my daughter. Hopefully each time I get annoyed I can look at my daughter and know that my body knew what to do in order to grow her, nourish her, and birth her.

What a real 3 week postpartum belly looks like!

I gained too much weight in pregnancy, about 45 pounds according to the doctor's scale, and about 52ish pounds according to my scale. Luckily, I had a healthy pregnancy and have a healthy daughter, but I didn't treat my body very well during those months. I didn't exercise or eat very well, and I know it's going to take a lot to get back into the groove that I was in last summer before I got pregnant. It's going to be hard and I know that, but I can do it. So hopefully this blog will get back on track with the road to skinny, although this it the third time to skinny, I can do it! It'll be a slow, hard journey, but I can do it.

Keep me accountable!

Three Weeks Old.

Molly -

Seriously, where is time going?! It's hard to look forward to each milestone while still treasuring each present moment and appreciating where we are right now. It's hard to figure out a balance! Each day you're growing more and becoming more alert, developing into your own little person and it's amazing to watch. I look back at your newborn pictures and already can't believe how much you've grown. I was going to take newborn pictures with Daddy, but I think the time has already passed. I just have to stay on top of taking your weekly pictures. Each day when Daddy comes home and he holds you and you hold your head up longer than the day before, he can't believe how quickly you're growing. He feels bad that he works such long hours and doesn't get to spend as much time with you as he wants to. He feels bad when he goes to play tennis with Uncle Billy, but he snuggles with you as much as possible.

It's amazing how I'm home all day, but I still don't have time to do anything, like call about bills, or a present I got for Daddy. He's really understanding about it though, and don't expect me to do too much during the day. Usually I feel bad that I didn't do anything. Daddy pokes fun at it, but he knows I have a lot to do just watching you. I have to wait until Grammy comes home from work and then hand you off to her and call. She loves holding you, so that's not a problem. You love listening to her, and I think you recognize her voice, it's so precious! I know how much she loves you and considering that you're named after her (middle name) it's only appropriate for you guys to be super close.

Grammy

This week we went to church for the first time and you were pretty good! We started out in your car seat, and hoped that you'd fall asleep, but you didn't. Then Daddy took you out of the car seat and tried to rock you to sleep, but that didn't work either. Finally, I took you and got you to sleep. When we were singing our last songs you totally fell asleep, and so I realized that you like to listen to me singing, so all week we've been listening to church songs and I've been singing to you. Works pretty good. Friday we went out with Grammy to get Pappy's prescriptions and get Old Pop Pop candy for Father's Day. Saturday and Sunday we went to Grandma and Poppa's house, and you were good there, too. Everyone loves holding you, except Uncle Quentin, he won't hold you yet. Give it time, he'll cave. You're so loved, baby girl, and I love seeing everyone fuss over you, it makes me such a proud mama!

Grandma

Since Sunday was Father's Day, I let Daddy pick what he wanted to do. He got to stand up in church and got a lot of "Happy Father's Day's" from everyone at church. I think he was very proud to be a father. Once we came home, he went to play tennis with Uncle Billy, then came home and napped with you for about 2 hours while I got some things done. Then we went over Grandma and Poppa's and he got to cut down trees with Poppa and I got to cuddle with you all afternoon. We went to visit Great Gma, too, and you pooped through your cute dress. Oh well, bound to happen sometime, right? At least you lasted most of the day in it!

Sleeping's been okay. We only slept in the recliner once this week, and that's because you were awake and I was dead tired so that was the best decision for us. Your sleep stretches are getting longer, we've had some 5 hour stretches! Granted, that's 5 hours between feedings, so sleeping maybe 3 1/2 or so, but I'll take it! You're not really a fan of napping during the day now though. I can tell you're really tired, but you won't sleep. I nurse you, make sure you have a clean diaper, but you're just awake. It usually takes until about 2pm or so for you to fall asleep, after feeding you every hour all morning. Oh well, you're still little, I'm not complaining. We're getting to the point where you want to be up longer after eating during the night. It usually takes a full hour from me starting to nurse you to you actually sleeping again, which means I only get 2 hours of sleep between feedings, but that's okay. I'm thankful I'm getting some sleep. We're also trying to put you in your crib for nap time. Well, I am, since I'm home all day, but that's going pretty good, too!

Eating is pretty good, too. We're still trying to work through this oversupply/fast milk issue, but we're getting there. Sometimes you get really frustrated and it breaks my heart to see you upset, I feel like I'm torturing you, but then other times you latch right on and you're a champ! I told Daddy I feel like every time we conquer the "big boob" you should get $1 in your savings account, haha! We're working through it. I have more patience with you though, I haven't cried at all this week regarding breastfeeding!

"Aunt" Krissy and cousins Isaiah and Colton came to visit on Monday. It was a totally sporadic visit. She asked if it was my first day home with you and I told her kind of since Grammy worked 2 Thursdays ago, and I was home for 4 hours, but she decided to come up! I was pretty excited since we had a rough night and I love seeing them. The boys were really good with you, although I don't think Colton was too happy that his mommy was holding you. He was touching your feet though, it was really sweet! Krissy got some pictures of that. It was so strange to be sitting here with you sleeping in my arms, and Krissy holding a sleeping Colton - for the 6 years that's between Krissy and I, it's nice that we're finally in the same stage of life, she's always been one life stage ahead of me. It was my first real realization that we're really adults and how far we've come. I think Grammy got a taste of what it'll be like in a year when you're walking and getting into everything - Colton was into everything. Oh well, we'll cross that bridge when we get there, I'll enjoy each day with you and all the baby snuggles I get.

You already rolled over, from your tummy to your back, TWICE! But I don't think you meant to do it on purpose, you were confused when you did it. You were frustrated and wanted to be picked up and were flailing all around and just flipped yourself over. I haven't been able to get you to do it since, but I'm glad I got to see it!

Daddy is still awesome, and I know he always will be. He loves you so much and wants to spoil you with hugs and kisses. Between me, Daddy, and Grammy I think you get about 8 millions kisses each day. Daddy loves snuggling with you when he comes home from work, he gets bummed when I have to feed you because he just wants to hold you all night. Our "schedule" of Daddy staying up with you until about 11pm, or being "on call" didn't really work out too well this week, you were hungry, so he got to sleep and I was on duty. That's okay though, I know that I need to appreciate each second with you, even if it means I don't get very much sleep.

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Did you/would you take newborn pictures?

I have an update on me, along with some pictures, scheduled for next week!

Two Weeks Old.

Hope my birth story didn't bore anyone - I wanted to include it since it's Miss M's journey, but I know it was long and quite detailed. I'm hoping to get to some other posts, and possibly back to some healthy living posts soon, but I am enjoying all the time I can with Molly.

Miss M,

Since our first week, you've learned to like your crib more now, and had a few nights of sleeping all night in the crib! Well, I say all night, but I mean sleeping for about 2.5 hours, up to nurse, then right back down in the crib until the next feeding about 3 hours later. On Saturday night, you were a little fussy, and Momma got a little upset with you because you wouldn't eat very well - you wouldn't latch on. I think it was a mix of sleeping all. day. long. and the walk Daddy and I took you on once he came home from work. We were going to try to go to church on Sunday morning, but I slept with you in the recliner for about 4 hours so that didn't work out. I was a little worried because you were only eating for about 5 minutes during the night, and going so long in between feedings, I didn't want you to starve, or have my supply go down, but I trusted my instincts to just let you go, if you were hungry, you'd fuss and I'd feed you.


You're such a great sleeper! We don't have to be quiet when you're napping, even if we're holding you, which tends to happen during the day. Oh well, Grammy loves to spoil you! We've been on a good schedule at night, getting up to eat every 2-4 hours or so, and not getting up in the morning until about 8am. I honestly don't mind getting up multiple times to feed you at night when I still get to sleep in until that late!

I think we're dealing with a little over supply issue, either that or my milk comes out really fast. You haven't choked, but I know it's coming out fast because it overflows while you're nursing. I always have to make sure to have a burp cloth handy so that I can wipe up whatever milk is overflowing everywhere. Sometimes I feel like a cow with milk shooting everywhere, but I know it's what's best for you and we'll work through it. Daddy is such a great help when I get frustrated. He always takes the first "shift" until about 11pm or so, unless you get hungry earlier. He loves spending time with you and hates if he has to work late since he gets to spend so little time with you anyway. He loves you so, so much and I love to see that connection you have with him. You're already Daddy's little girl.

 You're more awake for periods now, and we've started tummy time with you. You really don't mind it at all! We put you on our chests a lot and you're already so strong and pick your head up! Daddy is amazed at you each time you do it! I love watching all your faces and your smiles, even if they aren't real smiles yet. They're adorable! I could just stare at you all day!

We went for our first stroller walk this week! You slept the whole time! It felt good to get out of the house and go somewhere, I hope to keep that up with Grammy over the summer when it isn't too hot out. Daddy pushed you for a little bit, but then I wanted to push you since I need the exercise more! You were a little fussy that night, and Daddy thought it was because you were outside and we threw off your schedule, but I don't think so. I think you were just fussy, but when I say fussy, I mean that you were basically just making noises, you still haven't really cried.

Oh, we also went to Uncle Billy's graduation Wednesday night. You were awesome - sleeping through the entire thing, not even waking up to eat for 4 hours. You cried the whole way home since you were so hungry but we flew home and you ate for 25 minutes! You generally don't eat that long anymore. I felt bad, you seemed like you thought we were never going to feed you again. I was so worried during graduation that you'd cry and I'd have to feed you, which wouldn't have been bad, but I had to take pictures of Uncle Billy since it was only Grammy and I and she had the camcorder. Daddy had to work late, but he still came after work, he missed the ceremony but came to carry you around afterwards for pictures.

We also took our first couple outings this week! Sunday we went to Great Gma Crane's house and you slept in your carseat for most of the day, and Wednesday we went up to Kohl's and Babies R Us, and you slept the whole time there, too. You love sleeping in the car!

We gave you a pacifier again this week, and you like the one from the hospital. I don't think it's messed with our nursing routine, and you don't use it a lot, just when you're done eating and need something to suck on. I think once you find your finger/thumb you'll be very content, but I know that might not be for a while, and I'm okay giving you a pacified occasionally. I just don't want it to be a crutch that we try first if you're fussy, I want it to be a last resort, and so far, that's worked.


How's Mom?


I actually feel 100% healed! I want to take some pictures of what my post-baby body looks like, but I'm so proud of what my body did that all the flabby skin and stretch marks don't bother me one bit. I had a little bit of a hard time being okay with how I looked at graduation, but I thought I looked pretty good for 2 weeks post partum, if I do say so myself. I felt great on that walk we took, although out of breath, but I'm so out of shape it's not even funny. Sometimes I feel like a cow when I'm feeding, but that's normal. I don't think I have any "baby blues" at least not yet. I get frustrated sometimes, and the tears fall, but that's normal, too. Usually it's when I'm nursing and I feel bad because my milk is coming out too fast and Molly's hungry, but don't want to eat because there's so much. At least that's what I feel like is going on.

I know I can't push myself too hard, and I'll stick to walking for now, and maybe some yoga thrown back in if I can when Miss M is sleeping. I've been good with my sleep, too. I haven't had to nap in about a week or so. I might have to next week since I'm going to be here myself with Miss M, but we'll play that by ear. I know my mom works right down the road if I need her to come home quickly, she can.

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Any moms reading who have any advice for over supply/fast milk flow?

Birth Story - Part 2

The entire car ride, Daddy kept rubbing my leg, and reminding me to breath, while recording contractions. About halfway to the hospital Daddy stopped recording the contractions, they were one right on top of another and super intense. I didn’t know what the point of recording them anymore were - we were already en route to the hospital. Once we got to the hospital, Daddy asked me if I wanted to walk, but I could barely move the contractions were barely stopping, and they hurt! I had super intense pain in my hips all day, my hips flexors could not be relaxed! That’s where most of the pain was, in my hips. Daddy pulled up to the hospital entrance and unpacked the car - we had so much stuff! Poor Daddy, I think our hospital bag weighed about 50 lbs from all the stuff I packed. We had pillows and bags and a whole slew of things. Daddy unpacked the car, and helped me out, walked me in and I just walked through contraction after contraction while Daddy parked the car. I really though my water broke while I was pacing back and forth. So maybe people walked by, and I tried to smile at them, but no one talked to me or asked if I was okay - that kind of surprised me, I thought that I’d be whisked away to the L&D floor in a wheelchair like they do in the movies. But nope, I walked down to the elevators, and to the L&D once we got the the third floor. We buzzed in and the nurses were not very nice to us. They asked who we were and why we were there - so much for them being informed we were on our way. 

They had to find a room for us, meanwhile Daddy still had all our stuff and still had to help me through contractions, all while carrying as much as he possibly could. I truly could not have gotten through the day without him. Finally they got us a room, and I slowly walked to it, all while breathing through the constant contractions. The nurse was walking way a head of us, but I wasn’t going to try to keep up with her - I was going at my own pace. Once they got me to the room, the nurse gave me a gown and told me to take everything off, and keep the opening of the gown in the back. Daddy helped me change, I was moving so slow. I realized my water didn’t break like I thought, but it was just more mucus and blood. I finally crawled into bed, and the nurse was asking questions, taking my blood pressure, putting the contraction monitor on me - I honestly don’t know how I got through that initial questioning. You’d think they would ask you all that before you get to the hospital. Oh well, with Daddy’s help, I got through it. Once the nurses left, I knew I was going to throw up, thank goodness we took a puke bucket from Grammy’s house, or I would have thrown up everywhere in that room, not being able to make it to the bathroom and not having anything to throw up in. That was the only time Daddy left my side - he hates vomit, and it makes him vomit, which I knew. I threw up a good chunk, thinking in the back of my mind that a lot of women through up during transition, but I couldn’t possibly be that far. 

Once the nurse came back and threw the bucket away, she told me that Dr. Lincoln and Kathy were both there, and we said that if Kathy’s available, we’d love to have her - she’s the midwife Daddy and I met and we both really liked her. They told us they’d get her and once she came in to check me, I heard her whisper “complete, bulging bag” or something along those lines. The nurse was surprised, but I still didn’t get what they were saying. Then Kathy asked if she could break my water - I was completely dilated! Holy cow! I knew contractions were intense and right on top of each other, but in total honesty, the pain wasn’t that bad. Sure it was intense, but breathing helped out so much! I was so surprised that I wouldn’t have to labor in the hospital for hours and hours, even though we packed our bags prepared to do just that - we had a birthing ball, bathing suit, all kinds of snacks and drinks, but we didn’t need any of it! I told Kathy that she could break my water and she did just that. It was a warm gush that came out - and Kathy said it looked like it had a little meconium in it. Kathy said that the pediatrician would be on hand in case the baby didn’t cry right away, but if she did, they would put her right on my chest.

Somewhere in this process, Daddy texted family and told them that that I was complete, and they could make their way to the hospital soon - you were not going to take your time! We also showed our nurse our birth plan, and they were comfortable with it. Our nurse wanted to start an IV, but luckily Kathy had just mentioned that I didn’t need one, and we had her on our side and I didn’t get an IV at all! They only thing that strapped me to the bed was the contraction monitor, which I know they needed at least a 20 minute sample to make sure that you were doing okay and handling the contractions okay. I’m glad I didn’t have to labor long at the hospital, I feel like our nurse wouldn’t have been very helpful with anything. 

Once my water was broken, Kathy told us that she had to go speak at a conference, and we were just waiting for me to feel like I needed to push. She brought Dr. Lincoln in and told us that Dr. Lincoln was pretty much a midwife with a doctor’s title - she’d let me deliver on my head if I wanted to. Once she said that, it made me calm, knowing that I wasn’t going to have a doctor who was going to forget our birth plan and do what they wanted. Kathy said that she would be back around 7pm after she spoke, and if we waited that long then she could deliver you. It was about 5:45 at that time. The nurse joked and made sure I didn’t want any pain medication - there wouldn’t be time for it! I told her nope, that the plan was to go natural anyway! 

I was still breathing through the contractions, and honestly, I couldn’t tell you if they were more spaced out, I was so inside myself with my eyes closed and Daddy right next to me. Dr. Lincoln said to just call her when I felt like I was ready to push, and probably at about 6pm or so, in the middle of a contraction, I totally felt it. I told the nurse I had to push, and the grunted through the contraction, pushing a little bit. The nurse rushed off to get the doctor and everything set up for your delivery! Daddy said he never saw anyone move so quickly, they were all rushing around. Dr. Lincoln came in and was so patient with me and never told me when to push. In all honesty, I know that some people really like pushing, because they know they’re so close to meeting their baby, but pushing was HARD for me! And I didn’t even push that long! 

Anyway, Dr. Lincoln just sat there and encouraged me to hold my pushes, Daddy was right at my side. I was holding onto the bed rails for dear life, my hands actually went numb from holding onto them so tightly. I’m so glad I had no one counting to 10 for me, or demanding I push through a contraction. I actually skipped pushing for a contraction because I just needed a break. Dr. Lincoln was totally okay with that. I’m pretty sure she said something along the lines of “if you need a break, take one”. You were handling everything okay, heart rate was good, so I skipped just one contraction and breathed through it. I don’t even know how many contractions I pushed through, but it was very hard. It’s so hard to get to the point where you’re pushing correctly, and thank goodness for Dr. Lincoln to help me get to the point. Eventually they could see your head with dark hair. Daddy got to see it, too. I don’t know when, but at some point, I asked if I could touch your head and I got to! Daddy thinks that was my motivation to really push you out. I knew I just had to do it, and it would all be over. I also screamed, and it was so instinctual. Daddy said I took everyone by surprise, but that’s what my body told me to do, so I did it. It was primal and my soul was in it, that’s what I needed. 

More pushing, and more pushing until that famous, or infamous, ring of fire started! I yelled that it burned, and Dr. Lincoln said that’s when you know it’s almost over. At one point, I yelled “Holy crap!” and Dr. Lincoln said that wasn’t the only 4 letter word I was allowed to use! It made me laugh, and I’m glad for that. I was slower at pushing then, and took a few breaks. While I was taking a break, Dr. Lincoln said that I was doing so good, that’s how you prevent tearing, which didn’t even cross my mind! Eventually I felt like pushing again, and then the relief from your head coming out, and one last push for your shoulders to come out and there you were! The feeling of your body coming out of mine was incredible - something I’ll never forget. And it was over! Here you were - you started crying like a champ and they put you right on my chest and started wiping you down! At 6:37pm, after only about 40 minutes of pushing, and after being at the hospital for only about 1 1/2 hours, you were born - a May baby after all!

I kept saying “my baby, my baby, she’s really here” I looked at your Daddy and we both had tears in our eyes - we couldn’t believe you were here and with RED hair! I kept dreaming of a red haired baby, but I didn’t know if you’d actually have red hair. We of course checked to see if you were a girl, and then the nurse asked about a name. We didn’t even think about a name. I mean we had our list, but that was the last thing on my mind at the time. I asked Daddy what he thought - Marlee or Molly, and he kept saying it was up to me. It took me a good 10 minutes or so to make up my mind. With the red hair, you’re our Molly, Molly Kathryn, after Grammy. My middle name was after my Grammy, so I thought I’d carry on the tradition. Grammy is a wonderful woman, and she already loves you so much! And don’t tell Daddy, but since Mrs. Weasley from Harry Potter’s first name is Molly and she has red hair, I thought it was even more appropriate to name you Molly. 

Once the cord stopped pulsing, Daddy got to cut it, he said it was like cutting rubber with dull scissors, and then they took you to weigh you and do your length. You were on my chest for a good 15-20 minutes though, and I’m so happy about that. I’m glad you cried right away and we didn’t have to hand you over to the pediatrician super quickly. They actually shooed him away and told him they didn’t need him, and he was a little annoyed with that. You were a healthy 7.12 ounce, 19 inch baby. Sometime in there I delivered the placenta, I think you were still on my chest at that point, but I’m not really sure. That was nothing compared to you coming out though. Daddy was fascinated with that, and Dr. Lincoln showed us what it looked like. 

I had a second degree tear that had to get stitched up, but Dr. Lincoln was so friendly, she kept up the conversation the whole time and although it hurt a little bit, it was not problem. Daddy was with you making sure you were okay. Eventually they gave you back to me and we started nursing you about 30 minutes after you were born. You latched on like a champ! I’m not sure how long we fed you, but I’m so happy we got to so quickly. Daddy took some pictures and texted the whole family who was all in the waiting room. He texted them before we even had a name for you, and everyone was waiting for the decision about a name. Eventually, they helped me up and I was going to shower, but I was a little dizzy, and decided to wait for a shower. I knew the whole family would be anxious to meet you, Miss Molly, so while I was recuperating, Daddy was learning how to give you a bath and watched you get your shots - Hep B and Vitamin K. We declined the eye drops, but had no problem with that from any of the medical staff. At about 9:00pm or so, they got us all packed, put you in my arms and wheeled me up to the mom baby unit. 

Then family came in - Grandma and Poppa, Grammy and Pappy, Aunt Colleen, and Great Grandma Crane were all waiting to see you. Grammy teared up, but I think she’s the only one who did. I thought Poppa would for sure, but I didn’t see him tear up anyway. You got passed around the room and Great Grandma kept saying how precious you are, and how much your name fits you. Even though Olivia was our top name for so long, I’m so glad we picked Molly, I think it fits you so much better than Olivia would have. Although Daddy and Mommy have both slipped and called you Olivia already, that’s what happens when you get into a habit of calling you a name even though we both knew it wasn’t picked out officially. Daddy definitely slips more than me though, I think I’ve only slipped twice. Daddy said he’s just going to have that be your special nickname from him, and that’s fine with me. 

Great Grandma & Molly

I am so blessed baby girl, and I already can’t imagine my life without you! 

M's Birth Story - Part 1

Here's Molly's Birth Story - It's a bit lengthy, so I divided it into 2 parts so your eyes wouldn't bleed from ready so much. I was going to cut out details, but it's almost impossible to do that! It's a little TMI perhaps - so read at your own risk! 

First things first. I lost a little bit of my mucous plug on Sunday (5/27) night before I went to bed, and had some painless contractions throughout the week, but nothing painful at all. Wednesday morning I woke up with a little bit of blood, so Daddy knew we were getting close and he kept his phone on him the whole day, texting me a few times to make sure I was okay. 

Last Wednesday night while getting ready for bed, I was talking to Daddy and wondering when you were going to be born. I said that I’d rather you wait until June 1 to be born because no one likes the end of the month, but then I remembered that Daddy’s birthday is October 31. Oops. He just laughed it off. I stayed up until about 11pm, Daddy was passed out, but I was watching TV - Chopped, I think, on the Food Network. I was envisioning how I’d like labor to go, and thinking that I’d actually like to wake up in the middle of the night in labor because that way Daddy definitely wouldn’t be able to go to work and I wouldn’t have to try to get a hold of him and worry about how long it would take him to get home and wondering when I should tell him I was in labor, so I planned it all out in my head - start labor during the night, have Daddy stay home, stay at home for as long as possible, but that’s as far as it got. About 11pm, I decided to go to bed finally, wondering when you were going to come. Oh how close we were!

I woke up thinking that I was getting my period - they felt like period cramps. I went to the bathroom and remembered that I was pregnant - they couldn’t be period cramps! I came back in bed and looked at the time - 12:23am. I just laid there, trying to go back to sleep, wondering if I was actually in labor, or if these were just Braxton Hicks contractions. I did walk around a lot on Wednesday, trying to start labor. I didn’t go outside, but I was doing laps around the house, doing squats, pelvic rocks, whatever I could to start labor. I don’t know if it actually worked, but anyways I was just laying there in bed on Thursday morning feeling the contractions coming and going. I didn’t want to start timing them yet, just because I didn’t want to jinx myself and have them fizzle out. After about a half hour or so, I turned my phone on and opened my contraction app and started timing them - first contraction recorded was at 12:50am. About 1:30, Daddy got up to go to the bathroom and I told him he might not be going into work that day, I thought I was in labor. He got so excited and asked me what contractions felt like. I told him and we both thought it would be best if we tried to get some sleep. At that point, my contractions were less than 10 minutes apart, but because they were regular - meaning not consistently every 8 minutes or something, I didn’t know if it was true labor. I couldn’t sleep all night though, and I don’t think Daddy got much sleep either. Every time I would be relaxed enough to fall asleep, I’d get another contraction and tense up again. I tried to relax myself as much as I could, knowing that tensing up wouldn’t help me, but it was so hard! Eventually I got up and packed my hospital bag, and I think we turned the TV on at some point, too.

At about 5:30am, we decided to get up, and I hopped in the shower. Okay, well not hopped, but took a shower anyway. Contractions were still less than 10 minutes apart, some 3 minutes apart and other 9 minutes apart. They weren’t too intense, I knew that they lasted about 1 minute and after that minute I could breath and relax again. Daddy and I came out to see Grammy, who was frantic wondering if I was in labor. She knew Daddy’s truck was still home, and knew what that could mean, and honestly, that would be the only reason he’d be home. She was on the verge of tears when I told her I was in labor since 12:30am, and she was wondering when we were going to call the hospital and what we were going to do. I told her that we were going to wait and see how everything went and we’d play it by ear. She quickly showered and Daddy and I ate - I had some chocolate mini wheats for breakfast and had a huge glass of water - I wanted to make sure that I was hydrated enough - I did NOT want to get an IV and knew that if I was dehydrated then that would be an excuse for them to stick an IV in me. I had 2 big glasses of water and kept timing my contractions. After I ate, my contractions started to get farther apart. Great, I thought, it wasn’t real labor, I knew I should have eaten something when I first woke up, but I just didn’t want to get up, I was hoping that I would be able to fall back to sleep. So I texted Grandma Crane and Krissy, and told them both that my contractions were fizzling out. 

After Grammy left for work, Daddy and I tried to sleep some more, and we watched a few episodes of CSI Miami. I think Daddy actually got some sleep, but I was never able to sleep, I just kept timing my contractions. They were still pretty far apart, but they never went away. Once Uncle Billy came home from school at about 10 or so, Daddy and he went to play tennis. They made sure I was okay, and Daddy texted me while they were playing to make sure I was okay. I was pretty shaky, so I had a few pieces of pizza and more water to hold me over. After I ate, I was okay, I’m thinking my blood sugar was low or something. Once they got back from playing tennis, they wanted to play horse, so I sat on the rocking chair outside and watched them play. Grammy came home about 2pm or so, and she was still so nervous and wondering why I was still home. My contractions were a little closer, and a little more intense since I couldn’t talk through them anymore, but they were still manageable. They were averaging about 7 minutes apart, but I just breathed through them. Some were still about 15 minutes apart though, so the average on my app was kind of high. They were always about a minute long though. Grammy just sat with me once she got home and couldn’t believe how calm I was. 

After Daddy and Uncle Billy were finally done, I thought I should call the hospital and just let them know I was in labor for about 15 hours, even though the contractions weren’t close enough to go to the hospital, I wanted some confirmation that I was in labor and would eventually have a baby. So Daddy came in and made ramen noodles - actually I made him ramen while he was getting ready, and still timing my contractions. About 2:30 or so, I finally made the call, and the nurse asked me a bunch of questions - I wasn’t leaking any fluid and she asked about my bloody show and a bunch of other things. She put me on hold while she talked to the doctor on call, Dr. Lincoln, but told me to wait until my contractions were about 5 minutes apart and then to call again once that happened. I was a little frustrated, contractions were getting stronger at that point, and I didn’t know how much longer I’d be in labor. I cried a little bit, and your Daddy was so helpful. 

Almost as soon and I got off the phone, my contractions got closer together. And way more intense. I could only lean over your Daddy and have him hold me through the contractions. Eventually my average frequency was 5 minutes and I called the hospital again at about 4:30 or so and told them they were closer. They told me they would let the labor and delivery floor know that I was on my way. Daddy finished packing, while holding me during contractions. Grammy was in tears when we left, and of course, both neighbors Michelle and Mr. Becker were outside as I was walking to the car, so they knew I was going to the hospital. We asked Grammy for a puke bucket in case I got sick. We also put garbage bags down in case my water broke on the way. Honestly, I barely remember leaving, my eyes were closed most of the time, and Daddy kept recording my contractions.

..... Stay tuned for part 2 tomorrow! 

One Week Old.

Miss M -

Man oh, man, where has this last week gone? I can't even remember being pregnant anymore! I can't imagine life without you, it's hard to believe it's only been 1 week. How are we doing? Daddy and I love having you home with us. I have loved seeing Daddy turn into a confident, caring, loving Daddy. Not that I had a doubt in my mind that he wouldn't be that kind of Daddy, but it makes me tear up to see how much he loves you, all his nicknames for you - calling you Princess and telling you how much he loves you. 

You've already changed in a week, I think. You're a wonderful baby, barely crying at all, mostly just sleeping and eating, but that's expected for the first week. 

 Eating

I was worried about breastfeeding, super worried about it actually. I was nervous that I wouldn't be able to nurse because other women in our family haven't been able to nurse - their supply dried up, they think. Even though it's not genetic, I couldn't help but be worried that something would happen and I couldn't nurse either. I hope I'm not jinxing myself, but I'm pretty sure we're doing great! I nursed about 30 minutes after you were born, and we haven't had too many problems! I've been averaging about 2-3 hours apart, sometimes sooner. It's so hard not knowing how much food you're getting, but when we went to the Pediatrician on Tuesday, you already passed your birth weight, so we know you're getting food! The Ped. said that I should have no problem with supply, and I could push your feedings back to about 4 hours apart, but I'm not comfortable with that. I'll stick with 2-3 or whenever you're hungry. Sometimes feeding sessions are 15 minutes, and sometimes they're close to an hour, guess it depends on if it's a snack or if it's a full 5 course meal! 

We had one issue though - your latch wasn't very good, and I cracked and bled from that. I actually got out the manual pump I got from the hospital to see if I could pump because nursing hurt so badly! The first pump was blood and it freaked Daddy and I out! This was Monday. I stopped right away and called the lactation consultant, well after googling it first. Turns out it's okay if you drink the blood, it just might show up in your diaper. The LC called me back later that day and put in a script for a stronger cream that Daddy went to pick up. She told me to pump for 24 hours and see how it felt the next morning. It felt so much better and we got right back to nursing, but not after a few tears shed. We actually even gave you a bottle too, since I was nervous you weren't getting enough milk from just one side. So far, it hasn't caused any confusion, so I'm hoping we did the right thing. We tried to give you a pacifier too, to see if it would help you sleep, but you didn't really like that, and it made nursing a little more difficult, so I don't know if that caused any confusion for you or not. But we put it away for a while anyways. 

Sleeping

You sleep pretty good, but you like to sleep with us instead of in your crib. While we were in the hospital, you slept in your bassinet, but we were up so frequently to feed and you slept so often, that I don't think any baby has a problem sleeping in the hospital. Once we came home, you switched between sleeping on either me or Daddy's chest, or next to us in bed. You don't like the crib, but I'm sure you'll come around to it. Daddy and I manage on our sleep. We've fallen into a pattern, Mommy takes a nap during the day while someone is watching you, then once Daddy comes home and he eats and showers, he does the first "shift" usually until about 10:30 or so, and I wake up to feed you and let him go to sleep. And I get the rest of the night. It's so nice that Daddy's willing to help out so much, I don't know what I'd do without him! 

I've also loved sleeping on my belly again! Not that I was ever really a belly sleeper, but just having the option again is so nice! When you sleep on my chest, I usually go to the recliner and sleep, it's easier than sleeping in bed. 

Odds and Ends

We've had people in and out all week - your Grandma took off work Tuesday and Wednesday so that she could come over and help out. Since we live with Grammy and Pappy, there's not too much to get done, but she watched you while I napped, and did laundry for us. That was certainly appreciated! I'll be happy when I don't have to "entertain" and be on call for people to come over and meet you. I know I need to appreciate all the help I have now since I won't have it forever, but I'm sort of looking forward to just the two of us at home ourselves during the day. 

On Saturday morning before we left the hospital, they checked your bilirubin which was a little high, so they did a blood test and it was a little high - 8.4 - so they just wanted us to keep an eye on your skin and make sure it didn't get any worse. When the nurse came on Sunday to check you out, she assured me that you were doing very well and couldn't believe you were almost back up to your birth weight. It was really nice to have a nurse come and check up on you and answer any questions we had! 

Your stump already fell off! It fell off on Tuesday morning before we went to the doctor's. You still have the inner cord/scab, but I'm glad the main one fell off, I was so nervous about it! 

How's Mommy?

I want to include these, too, so I can remember what it was like postpartum. I would never change anything about labor or delivery, but no one talks about postpartum, and I kind of want to remember it. Let me tell you, it's something no one discusses, but it's tough! Not being able to get up out of bed is hard! Bathrooms were my worst enemy for a few days, and showering was a horrendous job. Each day it gets easier and easier, but it's hard! I've been taking some motrin when I needed it, as well as a stool softener (oh yeah, I went there!). I actually stepped on the scale Thursday morning and I'm down 20 lbs. from my pregnant weight - and I haven't watched what I was eating or been active at all! That's just from having you! I still have a loooong way to go before I'm back at my pre-pregnancy weight, but I'm so thankful for what my body has done, I don't mind the squishy belly with tons of stretch marks - because it gave me you! 

Emotionally, I have some issues - I get frustrated pretty easily, and I can tell my hormones are all over the place! Daddy knows when I'm super frustrated and helps out when he can. With the problem with nursing, I was very upset about that, and cried a good bit over it. I have moments where I'm so incredibly happy, and moments when I'm not as happy. I know it's normal, and I have family surrounding me to help out when I need it and I am so thankful for that! 

I thank God for you every day, and can't believe just how blessed I am to have you in my life. Love you to the moon and back little one!