She's Here!

Meet Miss Molly! She was born last Thursday evening at 6:37pm, weighing in at 7.12 and measuring 19 inches long. I have her birth story typed up, but it's 5 pages long, so I'll take out some details for the blog. She's also already (!) a week old, so I'll be typing up a 1 week post, which will still be in letter form. It'll hopefully go up next week, too. So stay tuned - in the meantime, enjoy Miss M's pictures!

About 30 minutes after she was born.

Daddy holding Miss M.

Family of 3.

Not getting sleep, but enjoying our bundle of joy!

Ready to go home!

Pediatrician.

I probably should have started thinking about a pediatrician a while ago. I've gone to the same group of doctors my entire life, and considering that they recently added a pediatrician to their group, I just assumed that I would take my baby there. I never met the doctor before, but figured that she's a pediatrician - what's not to like?

I don't have any one thing that I need a doctor to be on board with me on. Sure, it'd be great if they supported breastfeeding, and some of the other things I'm on board with, but I'm not one of those parents who isn't going to vaccinate their children at all. If I was, then I would have to search for a doctor with those views. 

*Side note: there's nothing wrong with choosing not to vaccinate. In my opinion, I'd like my child's shots to be spread out, but I'm totally not judging whether your child gets 8 shots at one time, or never gets a shot in their life.*

With my midwife appointment last week I decided to meet the pediatrician who was in the same building. The one that I'd been assuming I would take my child to.

I didn't love her. 

I didn't hate her either.

I don't know the kind of relationship I need/should/want to have with my pediatrician. We didn't totally disagree on any topic, although I will say the moment I mentioned the word vaccine she was very adamant about giving the shots on time with no changes in the schedule. The only other thing was that she didn't understand the concept of baby-led weaning, but seemed adamant about giving rice cereal as a first food, which I'm not sure I'm on board with. She also has a strong accent, which can be hard to understand at times. I hope that doesn't make me sound racist, I'm totally interested in other cultures, but it can be hard to understand people with strong accents, especially when you need to understand what they're saying. She doesn't have any children, but says she has a bunch of nieces and nephews which aren't the same as your own children in my book. Granted, she might not be able to have children, but she loves them and that's why she's a pediatrician, and that's totally understandable.

So once I got home, I figured that I would still use her as our pediatrician and if things didn't work out, I could always switch, right? But then I thought about another pediatrician a friend recommended. She didn't want her son to get any shots, so I thought maybe this pediatrician was more open to other ways of things, specifically with baby-led solids/weaning, so yesterday I called and made an appointment to meet with her. Luckily, Mr. Skinny was headed home early due to a rain day, and that meant he could come with us!

We didn't love her either.

I was kind of expecting a more "hippy-like" doctor, who pushed breastfeeding and natural childbirth. Wrong. She said she should have had 3 c-sections with her 3 9+ lb. babies and if I'm "lucky" enough to have a c-section, I should "praise the Lord." So not what I was expecting. I will say that I liked her more than the first pediatrician, mostly because she seems to give her medical opinion, but then not judge you if you decide to do something different. I mentioned co-sleeping, just to get her opinion and she said something along the lines of "if you want to be a California-sleeping-in-one-bed-family" then good for you, but I couldn't do it. She did mentions that breastfeeding past 9 months was silly, and people who have home births are doing it for attention. So while I don't agree with all that, I think she's more open to other people's opinions than the first pediatrician. She also gives out her cell phone and will take phone calls at any time, which is something the other pediatrician didn't even mention.

Mr. Skinny and I talked about it. Well it was more of a once sided conversation which was along the lines of "what do you think we should do?" "I don't know, whatever you want" But, I think we'll go with the second pediatrician. She's been a pediatrician for 36 years, and raised 3 children. She's gotten multiple awards for being the best pediatrician in our area, and comes with wonderful recommendations. If we don't like her, we could go back to the first pediatrician.

Man, parenting decisions are hard!

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How did you pick your pediatrician? 

40 Weeks.

Baby girl,

Our due date has come and gone, and you seems to be quite content in your current home instead of joining Daddy and I. Truth be told, I'm impatient, frustrated, moody and nervous. My next appointment in on Friday, and I know that they're going to talk about induction. Daddy's coming with me and he'll be my support. I'm starting to cave a little bit that you'd be safer on the outside than inside, but I've spent my entire pregnancy and before reading and preparing my body, and Daddy for a natural birth. I was so hoping I wouldn't be one to get totally wrapped up in my due date, knowing that they way they figure out your due date is strange, and that every woman is different and doctors don't usually think that way.

Due date shot.

It also doesn't help that every family member & friend is asking me nearly daily if there's any news. Half of me gets annoyed that they think I wouldn't tell them, and the other half just feels bad that I have no news to share. When I talked to the woman from our health insurance this morning, she said that the painless rock-hard belly things I've been feeling for a few weeks or so are Braxton-Hicks contractions. That made me feel a little bit better at least. I know things are moving in the right direction. At my appointment last week, I was still at 1cm dilated, but I'm 50% effaced now, so things are moving, but in the back of my mind there's that unrealistic thought that I could be pregnant forever.

With the passing of the Memorial Day family gathering, we know that the next time we see all of Daddy's family will be at your arrival! I'm excited for that, but a little nervous because I know the waiting room is going to be filled, and Daddy and I agreed that we'd like to just be a family of 3 for at least an hour or so before we introduce you to the rest of your family. I told Grammy about this, but Daddy hasn't said anything to his family about it, so I just hope there isn't any hard feelings about not being allowed in right away. I'm quite glad that I'm finished work, I get enough text messages through the day asking if I'm still pregnant, and I know that your Grandma, Grandpa, Grammy, Pappy and even Daddy are being questioned daily if you've made your arrival yet.

On Sunday night, I think I lost some of my mucus plug. I was super excited and told Daddy right away, and we couldn't sleep for a little, thinking that we'd be meeting you soon, but that didn't happen. You must be quite comfortable in there, and I'm currently looking for a name that means stubborn! Speaking of names, I've been doing more research on names and their meanings. We have a huge list to pick from, and I'm really hoping that you make the decision easy for us when you're born! The names we really like are super popular and don't have the best meanings. So we have a giant list with the meanings and we'll figure it out at the hospital. At worst you'll just come home without a name until we figure it out, haha!

We got another ultrasound last week to check your growth, you seem to be a little peanut, and the midwife just wanted to make sure you're growing okay. The tech said everything looked good and she was going to have the radiologist double check and she'd send the results to the doctor/midwife. I'm planning on asking her on Friday to make sure everything is good. I would love, love, love if you came out before Friday, because I know she's going to bring up getting induced, which terrifies me. I've spent all pregnancy and before preparing my body and mind for a natural birth that an induction makes me really nervous. I know that millions of women have inductions and their babies are born healthy, but I want to experience that part of womanhood without a filter. The end goal is a healthy baby, and if it comes down to it, I'd do anything needed to achieve that goal. We'll see what happens. I'm going to try to go to 42 weeks and if you don't come by then, maybe you'll be safer out than in.

Heartburn is around just about daily, and you also must be sitting on some nerve or something because my inner thighs feel tingly, and sometimes I'll get a cramp in my right thigh if I'm standing a certain way. I think I've dropped even more if thats possible because I feel like I have a bowling ball between my legs now. So I know things are moving in the right direction, you are just taking your sweet old time and proving to be a Crane. I've been trying to walk more, too, but it's so exhausting! With the humidity this past weekend, my hands and ankles have swelled. Nothing terrible, and I'm pretty sure it's just due to the weather mostly, but it's uncomfortable. Sunday night I came home and put my feet up, by Monday morning they were fine again. Stretch marks are also getting worse, but I'll take them and wear them proudly!

I also got this massive headache last Wednesday. I woke up at 3am crying it hurt so bad. I woke Daddy up and he just comforted me. I don't think he was really awake, but that's okay, he didn't get mad at me and that's what counts. He's been so great lately, he's my rock and my comforter. He's going to be an awesome Daddy for you!

Guess that's it this week. Hopefully I get to meet you soon baby girl, don't be too stubborn in there! I can't wait to hold you in my arms and see your perfect little face and see who you look like. You have a whole family waiting for you!

Love,
Mommy

Birth Wishes

Okay, so I know that birth "plans" can be controversial, and honestly, I understand why. There are so many ready made birth plans on the internet where you just check boxes, print it out and take it in without thinking about why certain boxes are being checked. I understand that I've never been in labor before, and can't plan for everything, but I know I've prepared myself and I've done my research and prayed about my ideal birth. I understand why I've included everything in my birth plan, and I understand that some things are totally out of my control. In the end, my baby is my goal, and I'll do whatever I need to in order to have her arrive in my arms safely. 

Here's my birth wishes:

Dear Birth Team,

Please help me to achieve the most natural birth possible. I’m so grateful for everyone who is helping me through this event! I have never been in labor before, but have spent my entire pregnancy reading and preparing for this experience. I am hopeful, prepared and determined, and am asking for as much support as I can get. 

Labor

• Please do not separate my husband and myself during labor or delivery
• I ask that no students or residents attend my labor/birth
• I would like to be free to walk around and get in any position that seems comfortable to me during labor. I brought my own birthing ball to use, and would like to be free to use the shower whenever needed, as well as walking to manage labor pains.
• I would not like to be hooked up to an IV unless it is medically necessary. If it becomes medically necessary, please explain why to my husband and myself. 
• I would prefer to continue drinking fluids (water, juice, gatorade) to keep myself hydrated
• I request that the hospital staff suggest natural ways to manage pain. I am aware pain medication is available, and I will discuss with my husband if I feel I need it
• I would like a hand held doppler to monitor baby’s heartbeat as much as possible so that I can move around freely during labor
• I prefer to eat if I wish to in order to keep my strength up
• I would like to labor without a time limit. If my labor stalls, please suggest natural ways to get labor going again without using medication. I would also like to have an unlimited amount of time if labor seems to stall - as long as the baby is not in distress

Environment

• I would like the door to remain closed
• I would like the lights dimmed, if it is daylight, I would like the lights to be off
• I may wish to play music, or I may wish for it to be quiet, please ask my husband which I’m preferring at that time

Pushing 

• I would prefer to push for as long as my body needs to, as long as the baby is not showing signs of distress
• I would prefer to push instinctively, in whichever position seems the most comfortable to me at the time
• I would rather risk tearing than having an episiotomy, and ask that the ob/midwife suggest different positions, use a hot compress, as well as guidance in when to push or stop pushing to minimize tearing
• Please ask me if I would like to touch the baby’s head as I am crowning
• Please ask me if I would like a mirror to see the baby being born
• If possible, I would love if my husband “caught” the baby, or if I could pull her up onto my chest as she’s being born

Post-Birth

• I would prefer that the placenta is delivered spontaneously without the use of  pitocin, and/or controlled traction on the umbilical cord.
• As long as the baby cries and has no obvious health problems, I would like to delay all procedures (including the vitamin K shot) until she is 1 hour old, or at minimum until I have breastfeed my baby on both breasts
• I would like the baby to be placed on my chest as soon as she is born for skin to skin contact & for me to nurse her
• I would like the staff to wait until the umbilical cord stops pulsating before clamping and cutting it
• I would like my husband to cut the umbilical cord
• Please do not give me Pitocin post-partum unless there are signs of hemorrhaging.
• I would like all newborn procedures to take place in my presence, while I or my husband is touching the baby.
• Please do not give my baby eye drops, I am willing to sign a medical waiver if need be

Hospital Stay

• Please do not offer formula, pacifiers, any artificial nipples or sugar water to my baby at any time
• I will be exclusively breastfeeding my baby
• I would prefer my baby stays in the room with me at all times, and if she needs to be taken from the room for any reason, my husband accompanies her

Cesarean Section

• I strongly hope to avoid a cesarean, but if the ob/midwife decides one is necessary, please explain the reasoning to my husband and I, and give us some time to discuss it and make our decision
• If a cesarean becomes necessary, I would like my husband to be present at all times during the operation
• I would like to be conscious
• I would like to hope or touch my baby immediately afterward, before an examination
• I would like my husband to accompany the baby wherever she needs to go
• I would prefer a low transverse incision on my abdomen and uterus
• Please keep me informed as to what is going on during the surgery
• I would like the screen to be lowered a bit so I can see my baby being born, or have a mirror so that I can see

If baby’s health is in jeopardy

• I would like to be transported with my baby if possible
• If I cannot go with the baby, I ask that my husband accompanies her
• I would like to have as much bodily contact with my baby as possible
• I would like to breastfeed or pump for my baby

I took this to my appointment yesterday and the only things she wanted to review with me was the eating - I think she thought I wanted like full meals, which I don't - I just don't want to be denied food. She also talked to me about laboring without a time limit, just warning me that if baby doesn't descend, she just might not fit through my birth canal, but I don't think I'll have a problem with that. Also, monitoring the heartbeat, there will be times I'll have to be hooked up to the monitor for a period of time, and if everything is good, I'm free to move around. She was great with everything else and has a copy of our "wishes" to keep in my file for when I need them!

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What do you think about birth "wishes"?

Maternity Pictures.

On May 6th, Mr. Skinny and I got together with a friend from high school and did our maternity pictures. She does them on the side for a little extra cash - she's a missionary - and had never done a maternity shoot before. Thank goodness for pinterest - we based just about all our shots from a pinterest inspiration! We had a blast, and I'm so glad we took them, and that we waited so late to take them! 

Have a look at a few of them! 

Did you/would you take maternity photos?

Thirty-Nine Weeks.

Oh baby girl,

I am so ready to meet you. Not to the point where I'd ask for an induction because you clearly aren't ready or you'd be more antsy to get out, and I have loved being pregnant, but I want to meet you. I want to see what you look like and cuddle you and give you tons of kisses. I can't want to see Daddy hold you, along with the rest of the entire family, which will all be waiting in the waiting room at the hospital for your arrival. Seriously, they're probably going to take up the waiting room. There were 15 people, I think, at the hospital when your Great Aunt Chrissy had your cousin Brian, and there will probably be about that many people or more waiting for your arrival. 

Daddy has been awesome putting up with a cranky me. Usually only at night when my back starts to hurt and I can't move very easily and have to pee every 5 minutes. He's being so patient, although I know he's just as excited to meet you as I am. 

Family is constantly asking how I'm/we're feeling. The answer has always been the same - good. Grammy asks every day before she goes to work if I'm feeling okay, and reminds me that she's always right down the road if I need her. I can't wait until I can send out that magical text that things are a-movin' but nothing looks that way right now. Even your cousin Krissy responded "give me something" when she asked how I felt this morning and I told her the same as every other morning. Everyone is certainly ready for your arrival, but you are our child, and with Daddy and I both being stubborn, I think you're just too comfy to come and join us. Don't worry though, it is nice and warm out here, so you won't be cold!

I don't think you have any room left in there though! When you move, I can feel you from top to bottom and I think you grew some more because you're back up in my ribs, which you nicely left alone for at least a month or so. It's hard to sit up straight, I spend most of the day reclining, which probably isn't all that good since I've read that the weight of the uterus can cause some problems with the blood vessels or something.

This past weekend was Harry Potter marathon weekend on ABC Family, and I told Daddy that it would be a perfect weekend to go into labor - I'd be distracted with Harry Potter movies! I might actually take some movies and my laptop to watch them in labor. I've seen them so many time that I wouldn't have to watch them, but it would be something to distract me maybe. Or maybe I'm just crazy and that wouldn't help at all, I have no idea.

No signs of labor, other than the completely painless maybe contractions that I've been having. They've been more frequent. It's hard to describe them but my stomach gets rock hard, usually just at the top. The only thing I feel is my belly getting hard, but that's it. If those are contractions, I'll take them for as long as I can, but I don't know if they are. No leaking, nothing else to report. I haven't worn my rings in a few weeks, which makes me slightly uncomfortable in public, mostly because I'm more old fashioned than anything else, but if someone wants to judge me, I'm 39 weeks pregnant, ask me and I'll tell you I'm married. (Geez, bitter much?) I'm also done shaving my legs. I don't care that I wear capris on a daily basis, I can't shave my left leg, and I'll fight against the "norm" and let them get hairy. My belly button hasn't officially popped, but it's getting closer every day.

I really thought something was going to happen on Friday night. I was fully prepared to wake up sometime in the middle of the night with contractions, but you proved me wrong. Then I had a feeling you would be born May 20th, but now that's past. Great-Grandma Crane was wrong with her prediction, too - the middle of May. Grandma said that she thinks you'll be late, but cousin Krissy texted me yesterday and said she's predicting Wednesday and Ryan is predicting Thursday - which is your Great-Aunt Jeanne's 60th birthday, so that would be cute! You'll make your appearance when you're good and ready. And I can do all I want to make you come now, but I don't think much is going to help since you're already proving to me just as stubborn as Daddy and me.

Daddy and I had our last "date night" this weekend - we went to see "What to Expect When You're Expecting" and it was okay. Luckily not the usually media presented birth, but not as funny as I thought it was going to be. Daddy hated it and tried to sleep through it. But then we went for ice cream, and that's always fun. I have a feeling we'll be going for ice cream a lot this summer. That's been my new favorite food. Grammy and I have been enjoying our girls day out for the past few weeks, too, since I won't drive myself to town in case I go into labor.

I would love if you could come soon, the midwife last week said they'll only let me go 10 days past my due date, and I'll fight, but I'd love to not have to fight about that. So you have about 2 weeks to join us before Daddy's gotta start arguing with people. Please come in the next two weeks baby girl! Of course if there is a medical reason, that's way more important that the birth I'm wishing for, don't get me wrong - I'd never put your health at risk. I'm all ready for you!

Hope to meet you soon!

Love,

Mommy

Locks of Love.

I spent some serious thought about my hair after my dilemma of the hair post and thought about what I wanted to do. After months of complaining about how long my hair was, and after our maternity pictures were taken, I decided to jump into the deep end and cut it all off!

Curly, long hair.

After straightening.

I had my mom chop off about 12 inches of hair!

My mom can't be a hair stylist - do you see how crooked that cut is?

After I got it cut (straight this time!) and styled.

I am seriously loving my short hair again. I was super anxious about cutting my hair since I'd been so used to it long for such a long time. I'm pretty sure I'll be spending the rest of my life growing my hair out and donating it, just because it was the only thing that motivated me to grow my hair out. My showers are shorter and it's so easy to take care of. I can still pull it back, kind of, and wear a headband which is packed in my hospital bag if I need it during labor/delivery if I want my hair out of my face.

I did mail my hair to locks of love, which is a controversial organization, but if they sell it to make money for wigs or use my hair for a wig, doesn't matter to me. I donated it so they could do what they want. Whatever they do is better than my 12 inches of hair getting tossed in the trash!

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What do you think of my new haircut? Have you ever donated your hair to Locks of Love, or a similar organization?